Showing posts with label thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label thoughts. Show all posts

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Feminist TV Club: Commander in Chief


One of my feminist/blogger friends had the rather smashing idea of starting a weekly Feminist TV Club! Check out what she has to say about it; hopefully you'll feel like joining in the discussion!

Books are great, but they sure are time-consuming. And when you belong to a book club, there’s a certain anxiety that comes with finishing the book on time and reading carefully. You know what’s more fun? Watching TV. You know what’s even more fun than that? Talking about feminism in TV shows with fellow young feminists!  

Which is why I, Becka, am starting a Feminist TV Club. Simply watch one episode of a certain TV show a week (20-45 minutes), and we’ll discuss it in the comments of a blog posting on my blog. 

The Details:
  • Available on Netflix Instant or on Sidereel. Starting with Season 1, Episode 1.
  • The blog post summarizing/discussing the episodes will go up every Monday starting August 8th, 2011 on my blog, Becka Tells All.
  • Any and all suggestions are welcome! Please shoot me an e-mail at: becka.e.wall@gmail.com to talk about potential TV shows to use (they can be a whole series, an episode, or one season of a long-running TV show that deals with a particular issue), how to structure this endeavor, or general tips to improve awesomeness.  

See you on Monday! 

Monday, July 18, 2011

Pro-Choice is Pro-Life (By Amelia G.)

This article was written by Amelia G., a woman who describes herself as "an undergraduate, feminist, seafood enthusiast, bookworm (and, more recently, blogworm)." She writes for Plenty of Otherwise!

"If you can't trust a woman with a choice,
how can you trust her with a baby?"
The other day I came across an article in the Michigan Messenger about how Thaddeus McCotter, a Republican running for president in 2012, signed a "Pro-life leadership pledge." This means that if elected, he'll "nominate pro-life judges, select pro-life cabinet members, de-fund Planned Parenthood and support legislation that would ban abortions after 20 weeks of pregnancy."


CPCs pose as abortion clinics, but do not provide abortion or contraceptives (nor do they refer women to organizations that do). As the Ms. article points out, CPCs are notorious for providing false medical information about abortion in order to scare women out of considering it as a viable option that might work for them.

I'm really uncomfortable knowing that I live in a country whose government damn near shut down over an argument about whether to de-fund an organization that does as much good as Planned Parenthood. And it hurts even more to learn that people are actively working to ensure that the nation's laws are on the side of CPCs that flat-out lie to women who come to them for help and comprehensive information.

As someone who cares deeply about reproductive justice and people in general, I'd like to take this opportunity to explain  to Representative McCotter, Judge Pauley, and everyone else behind all of the legislation that has come up since the last election — that pro-choice is pro-life.

A lot of people will be surprised to hear this, but I didn't always identify as pro-choice.

Yeah, really. Because let's face it: the rhetoric sounds great. Don't kill babies. That's something I could totally get behind, you know?

Neither of my parents are U.S. citizens, so they can't vote. Therefore, politics just weren't discussed in our house when I was growing up. I've read that statistically, parents have a great deal of influence over their children's political views. That wasn't really the case for me. I had a few opinions, but those were based shallowly on what I felt to be common sense.

So, when asked for my views on abortion, I would proudly declare that I was pro-life and thought abortion was wrong.

But once I got to high school, I noticed that a lot of people I really respected were especially passionate about their pro-choice views. And important things were going on at the time that forced me to seriously reevaluate my stance. In 2006, when I was a junior, my school district considered adopting an abstinence-only sex education program, to replace the comprehensive one that was in place.

People went apeshit. Friends of mine spoke out against the proposal at school board meetings. Medical professionals came in from out of town to voice their opinion, too. And in the end, we stuck with a comprehensive program.

I was pleased with the school board's decision not to adopt an abstinence only program (even though I didn't believe in abortion, I wasn't quite that conservative; I've always fully supported birth control). But I still could not understand how or why my friends felt so strongly about the abortion issue in particular. And because I knew my friends to be intelligent, compassionate people, I wanted to understand their point of view, so I started researching the topic.

I don't remember a specific moment when I "became pro-choice." I do know, though, that I kept finding instances where I could see myself agreeing that abortion was an acceptable option: rape, incest, poverty, etc.

But what won me over fully in the end were the personal anecdotes. By reading tons of stories about women's experiences with pregnancy, I discovered that it was impossible to put them into boxes marked with the aforementioned labels. It hit me that I couldn't call myself pro-life without taking women's lives and diverse experiences into consideration.

The Supreme Court's upholding of the "partial birth abortion" ban in 2007 (the year I graduated from high school) is the event that both tested and solidified my new pro-choice views. I was furious with the decision, even though when George W. Bush had signed the bill four years prior, I hadn't had a problem with it. That's because on the surface, "partial birth abortion" sounds awful; it evokes images of selfish women who, after 35 weeks of pregnancy, suddenly freak out and realize that they don't want to carry the pregnancy to term. So they go out and have an abortion.

But for one thing, "partial birth abortion" is not a medical term; it was coined by right-wing politicians. And secondly, come on, there have to be reasons for women to get an abortion that late in the game.

And damn good ones, at that.

One woman's story has really stuck with me over the years. It appears on page 14 of  The War on Choice by Gloria Feldt:
We were awaiting the arrival of a son. I'm diabetic, so I had more prenatal testing than most women. At twenty-five weeks I had an ultrasound and the doctor's exact words were, "Vick, you are disgustingly normal and so is the baby." At thirty-two weeks I went in for another ultrasound and my world came crashing down. They discovered that [the fetus] had not grown past twenty-five weeks, and further testing revealed that he had nine major anomalies, including a fluid-filled cranium with no brain tissue at all. He could never have survived outside my womb. My body was the only thing keeping him alive, and I chose to remove my son from life support. I'm a mom. I had three beautiful children, and in fact I have a new baby boy who's here with me now. Who are the people on the anti-choice side to judge me? They've never been in my shoes. I never in my wildest dreams thought something like this could happen, but it happened to me.
The abortion she had in 1996 was made illegal under the Partial Birth Abortion Ban Act. Her experience reminds me of the woman in NE who, earlier this year, was denied an abortion and forced to watch her baby die in her arms shortly after giving birth.

So this is why I feel so strongly that lawmakers should not get between a woman and her doctor. As NARAL's Speak Out for Choice Award recipient Katie Stack said earlier this year during her acceptance speech: "Women's experiences with abortion are nuanced and complicated. But . . . if [we are] given the opportunity to share these diverse realities, we can begin to challenge the stereotypes and falsehoods that are promoted by the anti-choice movement."

Pro-choice is pro-life. That's something I firmly believe and discovered simply by being curious and open. By reading. By trusting/caring about people, and respecting their personal opinions and choices.

I don't think that's too much to ask of humanity.

Monday, July 4, 2011

What does being a girl mean to you? (By Alexis Z.)

Alexis Z. wrote this piece in response to a question I've been asking for a while now: "What does being a girl mean to you?" If you've got a different opinion about what "being a girl" means to you, type it up and send it to me at teenagefeminist@gmail.com! See the official submission guidelines here.

Women are fighters. Even without the gloves.
[Being a girl] means that I can do whatever I want. I can wear what I want and not be criminalized because of it. Though today some men think that it's okay to rape a woman because she is wearing a short skirt . . . being a girl means that I can wear pants, shorts, or a skirt. It means that . . . when I turn 18 I can vote, I can join the military. It means that my fore-mothers fought for equality and they fought hard. We don't have perfect equality today and it would be nice to have it, but we do have some. 

Being a girl is a sense of freedom that I can be myself. [But it also] means that whenever I am in a bad mood it's [automatically] "my time of the month." That isn't fair. 

Being a girl means that I have to fight for what I want . . . Being a girl means that I have to prove myself in whatever I do and I have to do it right, because if I don't then it will be said that "women can't do that." Being a girl is a blessing and a curse. Everyone says that women are equal, but being a girl means that I am a minority, even though women are 52% of the world's population.

Being a girl is wonderful. I may have to fight for my beliefs, but the fight is worth it. Even if I get shot down once, I am going to keep trying . . . Being a girl means that I am never going to change my opinion on anything that is dear to me. I thank all of my ancestors who fought for the rights that I have today, and I will keep fighting for the equality that all women still have to gain. 

Being a fighter, a mother, a lover, a pusher, and being stubborn is what being a girl means to me.

Other posts in this series: 

Monday, June 27, 2011

Experimentations of a Teenage Feminist's Mom

I can't believe this day has finally come . . . Today is the one-year anniversary of Experimentations of a Teenage Feminist!

Originally I planned to write a long, sappy memoir about my "feminist awakening," but then I thought it'd be much more interesting to ask my mom what she's thought about this past year, and my passion for feminism.

For those of you who haven't had the pleasure of meeting my mom, she's one of the kindest, hardest-working, and most selfless people on the face of the earth. She's been in the door industry for 25 years and deals with everything from rough openings, to jambs, to stiles and rails (yeah, I don't know what the heck those are either); she's notorious for telling corny jokes that she swears her co-workers think are funny; and, like me, she's addicted to Asian dramas. 

Seriously. Jerry Yan, if you're reading this, please send my mom an autograph. That would pretty much catapult me into "Favorite Child" status for life.

ANYWAY — I could spend the better part of your precious "internet browsing time" gushing about all the reasons why I love my mom (and there are many), but let's get right to the good stuff.

Ladies and gentlemen, Experimentations of a Teenage Feminist's Mom:
I have to admit that this is a little bit out of my comfort zone, but when my daughter, Danielle, asked me to write a little blurb in honor of the one year anniversary of her blog Experimentations of a Teenage Feminist, how could I refuse? I mean, she's all about speaking one's mind, being real, and not being afraid to step outside of your comfort zone when it comes to the things you believe in, right? So here goes! (I hope I do her proud!) 
I have no doubt that Danielle was born a feminist/humanist. I've always been proud of her. She's a genuinely good person, with a big heart who works hard and excels at everything she puts her mind to. She has always had empathy for other people and is a strong believer in the "golden rule." It's no secret around our house that she has zero tolerance for jerks, idiots, or injustice of any type, and that she is ever in support of the under dog. It's only been in the past few years, though, that I've seen her passion for feminism grow. 
I had never considered myself a feminist. To be honest, before Danielle started sharing her views on feminism with me, I never really gave it much thought. Shamefully, I think I was one of those small-minded people who thought that feminists were "men-haters." But from day one of Experimentations of a Teenage Feminist, I could see the passion that Danielle put into her posts, and it was contagious. Thankfully, I wasn't so small-minded that I couldn't listen to reason. 
With Danielle, there is no hidden agenda. What you see is what you get. Or in the case of her blog, what you read, is exactly the way she speaks. I think that's what I love so much about reading her posts . . . She's just her being her, speaking her mind in a way that isn't preachy, while touching on subjects and feelings that most of us can relate to, whether we choose to admit it or not. 
I've learned a lot from her . . . I'm much more informed on feminism than I've ever been in my life, and although I can't promise that I will be as outgoing (or brave) as Danielle is, I think that I can finally say that I, too, am a feminist.
- Deeona Burch 

I attribute all of my social graces to this woman. Love ya, Mom.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

From the Curious Depths of My Backpack #1

The Keeper of Secrets

When I found a treasure trove of old writing assignments in my backpack, I thought: "Why throw these away? Why not post them?" Thus, a new post-series was born! Some of these old assignments might be quite comical; others might be incredibly sad considering all that's happened in the past few months. But whether they're works of art or worthy of the waste bin, they represent my journey as a writer. 

And yes, I made that sound more dramatic than it actually is.


"Where I'm From"
Written September 16, 2010

I am from a refrigerator whiteboard graffitied with witticisms that weren’t there when I went to bed, left either by curious Keebler elves or a brother hunting for a midnight snack.

I am from a 72-degree home with a thermostat-happy father, the lingering effects of last night’s salmon, and the blare of an electric guitar in the background.

I am from the water drip, drip, dripping down into our lush lawn and coloring it green, the perfect backdrop to a quiet, contented, neighborly cul-de-sac.

I am from sitcom marathons, cookie-baking escapades, hilariously painful pun sessions, and Sunday morning “Mom-always-wins” bowling. From Darrin, and Dee Dee, and DeWayne, and Donna; a litany of D’s.

I am from breakfast for dinner when no one feels like cooking, and Power Naps on drizzly afternoons.

From “don’t pick your nose or your eyeballs will fall out,” “don’t make me turn you upside down and shake your socks off,” and other threats only grandmas can muster.

I am from parents who have allowed me to make my own choices: from secularism, to humanism, to Unitarianism, to feminism.

I am from the bustling metropolis of Parkland, Washington, with infinitesimal flecks of “Polish” buried deep. From homemade lasagna and salty, buttery pierogies. 

From instances we’ll never let the butt of our jokes forget: falling out of a truck at the gas station, falling into a yard waste bin, and then into Iron Creek (poor Mom).

I am from the box of pictures under my parents’ bed, saved for Christmastime, birthdays, and drizzly afternoons (after Power Naps). 

By the four-hundredth picture of my brother’s chubby, smiling baby-face I tease: “What? Did you get sick of taking pictures by the time I came around?” 

But deep down, I’m happy. 

Irrevocably happy.

Friday, December 10, 2010

Do video games cause children to behave violently?

*Shoots zombie in the face* Teeheehee...
Since the time video games were invented - even before graphics were what they are today, showing magical lands, spaceships and yes, I'll admit, blood and gore in crystalline quality - concerned parents have pegged violent behavior in children as a direct correlation to the types of video games they play. If Jimmy is acting out in class the immediate question isn't "how did his parents raise him?" but "what sort of influences is he getting at home? Is he playing violent video games?"

These days parents are quick to penalize games that contain violence and gore, but they almost never want to accept that if a child's morals are already in tact, it doesn't matter if they're blowing up a zombie with a 12-foot bazooka. By the time a child is able to hold and maneuver a video game controller, he or she should without a doubt be able to discern what's truth and what's fiction, what's right and what's wrong. I implore the nation to stop using violent games as a scapegoat for bad parenting, and start bringing up children with enough moral fiber to know the difference between violence on a TV screen, and violence in real life.

Whenever I hear a parent or news anchor go on a tirade about video games being a major factor that drives children to behave violently, I get personally offended. My older brother and I have been playing games like Resident Evil for years (i.e. your objective is to survive a zombie-ridden world using as much artillery as possible), but we're still fine, upstanding citizens. That being said, I know firsthand that aggressive games do not have a negative affect on all children. There may be a case here and there of a child lashing out and replicating something he or she saw in a video game, but children can mimic violence from any source: movies, television, websites, real life. Violence is everywhere, and while it's extremely unfortunate that our society is so desensitized to it, violence isn't going to disappear anytime soon.

Oh Leon, when will you ever learn...
Should we lock our kids away in a dark, dank basement with nothing but a few chunks of bread and a stack of Mr. Rogers tapes? Or should we teach them the difference between right and wrong - the difference between what's acceptable in the realm of videogames, and what's acceptable in real life - before they get into the Big Bad World so they can make good choices for themselves?

Blaming violent video games for a child's misbehavior is the sorriest excuse for bad parenting I've ever heard. A person is not going to go out, beat up a stranger, steal his car and commence to wreak havoc simply because they saw it in a video game. If a person is being physically or verbally abusive it's because they have some underlying problems that have never been dealt with properly.

They say that our parents are our first teachers, and that's absolutely true. We may change as we start experiencing the world and accepting new people into our lives, but our morals - set in stone by our parents - almost never change. If we were taught to be compassionate and respectful, guess what? That's what we're going to be. But on the opposite end of the spectrum, if we're brought up watching Mom and Dad duke it out every night and thinking that's okay, we're going to have some serious problems. If parents are at all confident in the caliber to which they raised their children, they won't have to blame video games for petty reasons.

Saying that graphic video games cause violence in all children is the same as saying all elderly people drive like slugs, or that all blondes have to take their shoes off in order to count to twenty. It's a ridiculous stereotype.

Regardless of what has been found in labs or through critical analysis, scientists will never be able to say for sure that video games heighten aggression in all children, so we need to stop calling parents into question when they allow their kids to play these types of games. As long as they've instilled certain values into their children - like kindness, respect, and good judgment - it shouldn't matter. By the same token, if parents have such a problem with M-rated games I propose a radical, ground-breaking solution: keep them out of your house! Don't let your precious angels play them if you think they'll corrupt their character!

But please, don't go around blaming video games for our country's problems. Because honestly? Parents who waste time playing the blame-game instead of nurturing their children are the real menace to society.
_____________________________

After some thought, I'd like to add that the "degree" of violence in video games is another issue entirely. For example, I play games where the extent of the violence is knocking the head off a zombie with a chainsaw. Some games, however, take it to the next level by torturing humans. I've don't usually play games like that. They make me uncomfortable, and I'd be a bit wary allowing my kids to play something so graphic. I guess what I'm saying is, my original argument makes it sound as though I'm advocating violence, but that's not quite it. Parents have a right to choose what their kids should and should not be exposed to, but if their children misbehave they shouldn't blame video games alone. Get what I'm sayin'?

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

My Two Cents on "True Beauty"


You always hear people talk about "true beauty" like it's this untouchable, imaginary thing we keep locked up inside. I think this picture (taken at one of our Real Beauty Revolution meetings) proves that theory wrong.

True beauty is tangible, robust, uninhibited, and real.


Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Fighting Feelings of Guilt While Showing Compassion for Our Global Sisters

A few weeks ago a woman approached me with an MSN article that literally sent chills down my spine. It's called 10 Worst Places in the World to Live if You're a Woman, and it's absolutely heartbreaking. It begins: "Violence, rape and little or no education is a fact of life for many women all over the globe. While the feminist movement took off in parts of the Western world, many women are still treated as second class citizens . . ." And that's not even the half of it. In a list containing hot-spots like Haiti, Darfur, and Iraq, it chronicles the types of horrors that many women have to go through on a daily basis.

Like so many young people out there, I'm stuck in a relatively quiet suburban town (it's not quite the cliche, white-picket-fence deal you see on TV, but you get what I mean) so I haven't seen or experienced very much in my lifetime. Heck, I'm a child of the 90's, I grew up on a steady diet of Nicktoons and Otter Pops, I have a comfortable bed, nice clothes, and more comic books than anyone really needs. My version of a bad day is getting a "B" on a Chemistry test, but besides that? I've got it pretty good.

As this article makes us painfully aware, millions of women are suffering grave injustices and fighting each and every day just to survive.

I don't quite know how to put my feelings into words, but when you hear about this kind of stuff, it's like . . . a horrified soberness.

I mean, do you ever feel guilty? Guilty for having nice things, for eating a good meal - for even laughing? I felt that way after my grandpa died. I can remember wanting to go out with my friends, watch a funny movie, read a good book, eat a piece of that oh-so-delicious-looking pie . . . but a little voice in my head would always jump in and torture me: "how can you even think about enjoying yourself at a time like this?"

By the same token, sometimes it's torturous just to enjoy life when you know people around the world are suffering. Is there any way to deal with this? I have a theory:

As feminists, humanists, and activists, I think it's important to express constant empathy for those who are less fortunate than ourselves. We should take every opportunity to volunteer, donate, and serve our Global Sisters (and Brothers!) - and never, ever forget to be thankful for the things (and people) we do have. I guess what I'm learning is, it's unhealthy to let guilty feelings consume you; after all, it's a fine line between "concern" and "obsession." If we can get into that healthy mind-state - that balance between being overly sensitive and not sensitive enough - I think we can do a heckuvalot more to help those in need.


So. Thinking beyond our own selfish existence here (and yes, I stole that line from Jeepers Creepers, one of the best horror movies of all time), what can we do to make a difference here and now? I've been told "not to expect to change the world," but all things considered, I think that's a pretty admirable goal.
____________________________

If you want to get your philanthropic juices flowing, I'd suggest "You're the Voice" by one of my favorite bands EVER, the oh-so-lovely and fierce Heart:

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Shh! Don't Say the F-word


I'm a feminist. Man, that feels good.

I've been a feminist all my life but didn't realize it until a few weeks ago when I checked out a twenty-pound stack of books from the library (everything from Jessica Valenti's Full Frontal Feminism to Ariel Levy's Female Chauvinist Pigs). Somewhere along the line something clicked; maybe it wasn't as glamorous as the whole light-bulb-over-the-head charade, but it was pretty dang life-changing.

My name's Danielle and I'm your typical high school student. Even though I suffer from over-achiever-itis my friends still know me as the nice, funny one. I believe in honesty, compassion (all of that philosophical mumbo-jumbo) and really try to be someone my parents and friends can be proud of. But sometimes even that feels like a revolutionary act when you're drowning in a sea of teens who go around disrespecting everybody within a 5-mile radius. (But in their defense, I have met some pretty awesome kids, too.)

I've never understood any of the 'isms. You know what I'm talking about: racism, ageism, classism, sexism . . . anything that deems one group of people better than another. In my (some would say "twisted") mind, people are just people. The last time I checked we all laugh, cry, feel, and bleed (unless you're spurting some outlandish green liquid that I don't know about . . .?)

When I realized I was a feminist I thought "what do I do now"? I was honestly scared to tell anybody about my new "discovery" because I wasn't sure how they'd react. The first person I told was my mom; she looked at me and said "I know that, silly. I've always known that." What a gal! She knew one of my intimate secrets before I knew about it! Next came Grandma, which worried me a little. Not only is Grandma religious, she's very outspoken. Her philosophy? "If you don't like me, too bad."

Me: "You know, Grandma . . . I'm a feminist."

Her: "Well, yeah . . . I've always said that. I will never let a man control me."

But why did I have to feel this way? Like I was unearthing a dirty secret, my own straight girl's version of coming out of the closet? Why am I scared for the future, of what people will think of me? The fact is, today's world is dangerous for teenagers like me (and you, if you're reading this) because the "f-word" is marred by too many stereotypes to count.

Our latest assignment in English, for example, was to debate the topic "should women be treated differently than men?". After several girls dropped the "f-bomb" one of my (male) classmates blurted out: "Feminism? Isn't that where guys, like, put on girl clothes?"

You can't see me, but I'm cringing! It seems like only a miniscule fraction of people know what feminism actually is, and the rest look at things through media-eyes, associating all feminists with radical, hairy, man-hating lesbians (I'm not putting down homosexuality, but you know what I mean). In fact, my favorite quote comes from Pat Robertson, host of the religious variety show The 700 Club: "[Feminism is] a socialist, anti-family, political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism, and become lesbians."

In the words of my 8th grade English teacher: Really, Pat? Really? If this is the crap I'm going to have to deal with, looks like I'm going to have to grow some thicker skin ASAP.


All pig-headed, right-wing nutjobs aside, I am absolutely in love with feminism. To me, it's not so much a philosophy as it is incredible people standing up for the rights we, as humans, inherently deserve. And if feminists are simply those who believe in "the theory of political, economic, and social equality of the sexes," wouldn't that make most people feminists (even if they don't like the label)? That's a reassuring thought.

So I wanted to write a blog about something I actually understand. I'm not an award-winning physicist or world-renowned psychologist (yet!), but what I do understand is the stuff swishing around in my noggin. I want to write about life from my perspective - a feminist teen just trying to make sense of the world - and hopefully appeal to others who feel the same way (but who haven't necessarily found their "feminist outlet").

In the end, I decided to call this blog Experimentations of a Teenage Feminist:

Experimentations referring to the fact that life is one big experiment. We do what we think is right, hope for the best, get knocked on our behinds most of the time, but inevitably pick ourselves back up. Ah, life.

Teenage referring to the fact that I am technically (i.e. biologically) still a kid. So if I make mistakes, complain, or go a little over-board in my rants, blame it on my age. I don't have to go all "Yoda" until I'm at least twenty.

Finally, Feminist referring to the fact that I've finally found my niche. I was born to be one of those "annoying" girls who stands up for what she believes in. I was born to help other girls realize their potential, gain confidence, and ultimately love themselves. And I was born to (please prepare yourself for the corniest statement of the century) make the world a better place.
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